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Category: The Prêt-à-porter series

Eegant style problems

The High Maintenance dilemma: is smartness underrated?

Raise your hand if you are familiar with this scene: you have just arrived at the office after a good hour in the commute surrounded by too many people, made it all the way in stilettos from the suffocating underground to the company building carrying your take away coffee, laptop and birthday cake for Amanda from the accounting department, and then logged in on time to collapse on your desk.

This morning you had to skip Yoga because your child did not feel like dressing up and husband had the flu. Even so, you managed to make yourself presentable. You managed to dress up for you, to feel good. Then, Tom and Claire from the Creative Editing team say hello and absently comment on how nice your dress looks and, you know, how hard it must be to get ready every morning because well, it is SO hard maintenance — and aren´t you actually sick of spending some much time just to get ready in the morning when you have much more productive things to do, surely?

The thing is, you see, Tom and Claire do not mean IT is high maintenance. They mean YOU are. Déjà vu, anyone?

Shockingly, it seems to be socially acceptable to comment on other people appearance these days, especially women’s. With social media blooming, everyone spends a lot of time leaving opinions on posts to perfect strangers (“What a stunning outfit!” “Is that your husband?” “But have you gained some weight lately?”) and the scope of this phenomenon has naturally transformed our daily interactions. People seem to feel entitled to comment in real life too, just as they would on Instagram, and not always out of kindness. If you take a minute to scratch the surface, an interesting patina of tones appears underneath — the complete palette of social prejudice. Misconceptions die hard, even in the age of political correctness.

 

Women smart style problems

 

One of my personal pet peeves is related to criticism towards smartness.

Very frequently, people will frown at the sight of a nice dress, coat or bag, and discreetly let you know they don’t approve. The succession of reasons provided will pour like rain over you — it is too expensive, impractical, pretentious. But where is this perception coming from? And is elegance considered a disgraceful quality these days?

It might sound crazy when you read all those articles on the flamboyant latest catwalk designs from Paris Fashion Week, but in my experience, most people do not appreciate that kind of stylishness anymore, since they cannot consider it as an integrated part of ordinary life. While maintaining discussions on the topic, they will argue that several factors need to be taken into account. Frequently, the first ingredient they will bring into the conversation is classism. I don’t know about you, but I take class discrimination seriously and I don’t like it to be used on a frivolous manner.

 

Elegant business women problems

Let me illustrate with an example. A few years ago, still a penniless humanities student, I found myself having a coffee with a recent acquaintance I’d had just been introduced to. By then, I would combine my college classes with a part-time job teaching foreign languages to kindergarten and school children. My allowance was very modest, and I carefully saved up and prioritized my expenses. I started spending some time hunting for good quality bargains at vintage and online shops. As a result and given the circumstances, my wardrobe grew up slowly but successfully.  The girl I met that evening did not lose the chance to let me know she liked my dress although she would not understand why would I spend “so much money” on it. “It must be nice”, she said, “to get your expenses covered by your very understanding family, right?” Then she made a gesture with her hand, vaguely pointing out my clothes and manicure (a manicure that I would give myself at home every time). She shamelessly implied my family was rather wealthy. And I was far too shy to correct her rude judgmental statement. Then she proceeded to complain about the hard time she was having to find proper accommodation for her next holiday in Austria. I swear God I am not making this up.

My point is this person (as many other) linked dressing in a certain manner with a well-off economic and social status. And of course, she disapproved. Paradoxically, she was doing far better than me then. There is a big difference between dressing on designer pieces head to toe and carefully crafting your style. Still, many people don’t see it that way. If you are able to gather a luxury couture wardrobe, good for you too! I see no reason to shame anyone here.

 

Smart style problems

Next argument detractors hold against smartness is practicality.

We all know how crazy life is these days: we find ourselves rushing on a daily basis and sometimes we don’t even take a minute to enjoy. Now, I am as busy as the next person (just as much as you probably are) and always try to wear clothes which easily adjust to my daily activity. I work in the comfort of an office, but flats will win three out of four times when it comes to commuting.

However, since I have not much time to stop and smell the flowers, I like to do some small things to indulge myself. They do not need to be big impressive things, necessarily: cooking something nourishing,  buying a nice book to read in the evenings, dressing up a bit. They are the small everyday pleasures I use to comfort myself and to keep inner balance. Even so, there will be always people judging you. Do not listen to them. As our friend Taylor Swift once taught us — haters gonna hate.

 

Eegant style problems

But my favourite plot is the high maintenance one.

Because well, you know, if you are wearing nice clothes it obviously means that you are some kind of spoiled creature, right? In the course of years, I have been seen people repeatedly gossiping about women who make an effort with their appearance. “But look at her!”, they would say, “She thinks she is some kind of queen, doesn’t she? I bet she even needs a maidservant to get dressed in the morning”. Do you think I am exaggerating here? I wish I was. I literally heard someone who used to talk behind my back calling me “a duchess”. In case you’re wondering why my only sin was to dress up for a casual outing with some friends… No need to say I have heard similar comments about friends, siblings and work colleagues.

Probably, the most unfair factor here is the insane amount of misogyny lying behind the question. Women are judged twice harder than men. If a man is smart, he will be usually praised for it. On the contrary, if a woman develops a taste for fashion, she will be considered frivolous. They will say she is wearing too much makeup or dressing up to catch men attention… However, if this fictitious woman freely decides to wear a bare face or comfortable sports clothes, she will be considered sloppy and lazy. Pick your poison.

Double standards will never let us women win and that is the reason why we need to stop contributing to the problem by criticizing other ladies and start fighting in the sorority team. I know it is not always easy, as we have been all raised on prejudice and socialized on a system whose deeper structures work against individualism. Every time we choose to deconstruct these ideas and stop the gears, we are placing ourselves in the line of fire. It is a conscious decision and it takes guts to do it. Still, it is the right thing to do.

Next time Tom and Claire make a passive-aggressive comment to your office colleague in front of you, do not look the other way. Let them kindly know it is not OK to express unsolicited opinions about other people looks. Maybe they are not conscious about being inadvertently rude. If they are though, you will make them notice this kind of behaviour is not welcome around the place. At the end of the day, we are all people who deserve some respect, no matter what are looks, beliefs or origins are.


 

And this was another episode of The Prêt-à-porter Series. In the next chapter,  we will have a talk about some basic tips to dress up for a Brunch.

Stay tuned for more style advice!

 

February 4, 2019February 3, 2019

Allegra Caro9 Comments

How to dress like Dita Von Teese

Fun fact: Not many people know that the etymology for the word glamour seems to have its origins in the Scottish term gramarye, meaning magic or spell.

(Well, maybe it is not SUCH a fun fact – I am sure you will excuse my pedantry, this is what happens when you spend too much time surrounded by books and not by real human beings, especially being the kind of an introvert who would rather eat her aforementioned books than talk to a total stranger for five minutes… Please, do not punch me with a book on the face… But I was trying to tell you a story, surely?)

Once a naive English language student, I learned this etymology by heart and immediately started associating it with a very personal memory: all those rainy Saturdays of my childhood, when my mum used to make us hot chocolate and play an Old Hollywood classic movie on TV.

Those actresses on them – ruthless, fierce, awesome – had nothing to do with the cute beauties in the 80´s or 90´s films. They were, I was and still am convinced, the quintessence of glamour.

The point is, glamour is indeed a sort of spell – you don´t really need to be gorgeous, but to become kind of a human magnet. It is more about personality than about beauty.

And then, about the same period, I heard Dita von Teese on a late-night show, saying glamour is not about youth, age or race. This idea truly resonated with my own perception on the matter. To me, iconic figures such as Bette Davies, Marlene Dietrich or Mae Wong represent this concept, but they did not fit the classic beauty standards at all. Just as Dita does not fit them.

The reason why people are fascinated by her is the way she represents herself in front of the others. The persona she has carefully crafted and created. More than once she has declared she started as a plain-Jane from Michigan. However, she managed to tailor herself a charm armour no-one would be indifferent about. To me, this is the whole point on glam. She found out her own thing and went ahead.

Now, when I suggest the topic of this post, I am not telling you to turn yourself into a Dita wannabe.

As she did, we should all go and find our own thing. Nonetheless, there are some outfit formulas she relies on which I find universally approachable and stylish, and this is what I really wish to share with you.

How to dress like Dita von Teese:

ditavertical

Outfit formula 1: The Sophisticated Lady

There is something indefinitely elegant on the combo formed by a well-tailored circle skirt and a simple turtleneck. Pair it with some nice heels and fine accessories and you get a look which can be used for any smart event, day or night.

ditavertical2Outfit formula 2: The Naïve Girl

Same skirts can be used with a nice blouse or cardigan and flats for a more casual look. It allows you a bit more movement freedom for daily errands (count me in for this, always), plus it can be always toned up with a couple of fancy earrings or a quality bag.

ditaoutfitformula3

Outfit formula 3: The Bombshell

Well, most of us might never see the red carpet closer than we do on the MET gala pictures, but if are going out for a date this outfit formula totally counts. A pencil dress is a classic we usually underestimate, but with the right shoes and accessories, we can all experience a bit of that vintage glam Dita likes to share.

ditaoutfitformula4

Outfit formula 4: The Librarian

Looking for an everyday look? We have seen the burlesque queen wearing a simple pencil skirt and cardigan frequently. You can match them with a nice scarf and glasses too for an easy daylight outfit. Clean, simple and classic – a combination which never fades.

Howtodresslikeditapinterest

These were some ideas on how to bring a bit of old school glamour to your wardrobe. Which of them would you adapt to your own style? Have you got any favorites?

In the next chapter of The Prêt-à-porter series…

The High Maintenance Dilemma: Is elegance a bad thing today?

Stay tuned for more monthly style tips!

December 10, 2018January 15, 2019

Allegra Caro18 Comments
How to wear designer clothes on a budget.

How to achieve the designer look on a budget

There is something undeniably mysterious about haute couture: it is breathtaking on the catwalk, but if you are lucky enough to cross paths with someone wearing it in real life, it’s pretty much like seeing a unicorn — you can only freeze and stare at it in awe.

For most of us, couture fashion seems out of reach. We can for sure follow every Paris Fashion Week religiously, buy every Vogue issue and even spend dozens of hours a year looking at those flawless red carpet actresses wearing Dior or Escada (Er, am I the only one with a slightly weird obsession about the MET gala pictures? I am not, right? RIGHT?), but too frequently for us, poor souls, that’s all there is to it.

Vogue magazine and fashion tips

An average professional woman may be able to invest in a designer bag as a nice form of emancipation self-indulgence, but will she spend thousands on her closet regularly when the car insurance bill pay, or the latest kindergarten payment arrive? Most likely not. So, should we then assume that middle-class women must simply give up and start dressing in rags — a modern Charles Dickens parody, with office workers window shopping clothes they cannot afford —, forever doomed?  Well, I don’t like tragedies other than Shakespeare´s.

So, how do you glam up? Is it possible to achieve the fashion couture look on a budget? Or even get designer clothes for less? (Spoiler alert: it is.) After a few years of rights and wrongs, these are the lessons I have learned along the way.

1. Shop second hand

One of my sisters, who is also the biggest French couture fan ever, once said to me: “Do you know what looks like Chanel? Exactly, Chanel .” Yes, I know. Captain Obvious reporting for duty! But before you stop reading and click away, please let me explain. What she actually meant was you might have no budget to grant a quick trip to Les Champs–Élysées for a brand new Gabrielle Hobo bag, and that’s OK. But there are other options out there. Have you ever considered second-hand market, for instance? Nowadays, the internet is riddled with specialized apps where you can find virtually anything. Including designer clothes. My personal favourite is Depop (just don’t tell the others, they are jealous…), but the list is never-ending.

2. Don’ t miss the sales

This is another one that goes without saying. Check the designer website sales regularly. If you pay attention enough, it is not difficult to find huge discounts during the appropriate seasons. It is possible to make 70% off, and even more in the last items. Just make your research with a good cup of tea and remember to thank me afterwards (or simply buy something gorgeous, that’s fair enough, anyway).

Vogue, Vivienne Westwood.

3. Commission tailored clothes

Find a nice dressmaker locally who can honor your figure and personal tastes. It is not necessarily expensive, and nothing fits better than custom made dresses. Or you can just drop that brand new dress to the seamstress to make it fit like a glove. Usually, it requires a few adjustments only to transform a decent dress in the most fetching piece. This is something I do myself frequently, and an easy way to upgrade your closet quickly. Do you know want to look like Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s but without debt in your bank account? (Well, and maybe without that weepy scene, looking for your cat under the rain. I don’t know about you, but I prefer not to lose my cat…) Then go for it.

4. Find quality shops in the high street

This might sound to you a bit like the quest for the holy grail, but I promise is not. It may require a bit of patience and research, sure — the effort is totally worth it, though. When I first moved to Bucharest five years ago, I noticed women wore what it looked like designer clothes. However, I knew the national average salary was not that high. Where were these ladies shopping, then? The answer came to me quickly: the capital was full of little boutiques where you could purchase fancy coats, dresses, and bags for a fraction of the haute couture prices. In no time I became kind of an expert to be out and about, entering every shop, selecting the most affordable quality pieces. Not only my closet is thankful for it, but also my account balance.

5. Make your research.

Some time ago, a friend asked me: “How can YOU afford your clothes?” By this, she meant how could I afford a nice wardrobe given my modest salary. I replied without missing a beat: “I invest time.” And it was true. Whenever I had some spare time and felt like going for a walk, I would take the chance to visit some shops and see what they could offer. I would compare prices and quality. I am still doing so nowadays. Patience and time to make your research is the best advice I can give you. Go outside once in a while, get a coffee to go, do some window shopping. At some point, you will start figuring out what works for you and your budget.

 

And a last piece of advice in the shape of a bonus: just experiment. You do not necessarily need that coat/dress/handbag that makes Blake Lively look like the ultimate it girl to feel good (for a start, most of us haven’t got her hair or personal stylists, have we?) So don’t push yourself too hard. In my case, it is a lot of Vintage, and I don’t really care if people might think I look a bit extravagant (or even a bit out of a time capsule, for that matter). After all, style should be fun. And like Cindy Lauper very kindly pointed out: Girls just want to have fun.

Ways to get the designer look on a budget


 

This has been the first chapter of Prêt-à–Porter series.

In the next chapter: How to dress like Dita Von Teese! Coming soon…

November 11, 2018January 13, 2019

Allegra Caro5 Comments

Hi, I am Allegra!

A thirty-something Spanish expat with a love for Haute couture, culture and period dramas. Way too many little back dresses in my closet. You can read more about me here.

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January favourites: Rogue & Rouge edit

A little round-up featuring my January 2019 favourites, including beauty, fashion and more … Continue reading →

February 6, 2019February 6, 2019

Allegra Caro

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So, I finished Crazy Rich Asians a couple of days ago and, as I predicted, it was one of the funniest books I have read recently. 💗 It is full of witty humor, plot twists and hilarious characters. I liked it so much, I immediately purchased China Rich Girlfriend which I am enjoying now in the evenings. 📚 @kevinkwanbooks has got a natural talent to portray human nature, not to speak about his skills to let us catch a glimpse about a hidden and delicate whole world. I wrote about this and other January favourites at www.rogueandrouge.org Go and have a read. . . . #bookstagram #instareads #instabook #bookworm #lifestyle #uklifestyleblogger #lifestyleblogger #lblogger #lbloggersuk #igreads #booklove #booklover #discoverunder10k #microblogger
Let me tell you something about me: I LOVE my food. 💖 Sebastian knows this and he does his best to spice up our weekend dates with the most awesome cafés, bistros and restaurants every time (now, that's a husband!) 💍💫 Yesterday, we discovered a new place specialized on veggie and vegan dishes. We ate DELICIOUS pumpkin curry and vegan burger. 🍔🥘 And I am already dreaming about our next visit. Off topic: can someone tell me why do I look like a soap opera villain in this picture? I swear I am actually nice. 🤣 How is your weekend going? . . . #uklifestyleblogger #foodstagram #instafood #lifestylebloggers #sundaybrunchday #sundayselfie #sundayvibes #sundayfunday #brunch #brunchday #brunchlife #brunching #brunchsohard #brunchgoals
#throwback to the weekend, when weather was warmer and I felt like a human being. This morning I woke up feeling rather poorly (hello dyspepsia, my old friend) and my day has consisted of staying in bed with camomille tea, stomach pills and a hot water bottle. 🤕 However, Sebastian could stay home and take care of me which totally saved the day. Although my wednesday motivation is gone, luckily all the weekly blog content was scheduled on Sunday as usual, so there is a new post online featuring my January favourites. Link on the bio! . . . #ukfashionblogger #ukblogger #fashiondiaries #fashiongram #instafashion #lifestylebloggers #lbloggersuk #styleover30 #over30blogger #discoverunder10k #blogger #bloggerlife #microblogger
I was talking to my sister @emuverso about our last holiday together, remembering all the nice walks and moments, and food outings we enjoyed in Tokyo. As a consequence, now I have the craziest crave for #takoyaki🐙 EVER. I am going to try and cook my own at home this week if I can find a proper tray locally. Pray for me and my poor kitchen... In between, I have updated my blog with a brand new article about style and social perception. If you want to support, link is on the bio. . . . #lifestylebloggers #lbloggersuk #mytinyatlas #passportready #passportreadygo #travelblog #travelgram #instalife #instatravel #blogger #ukblogger #trip #japan #tokyo #asakusa

Recent Articles

  • January favourites: Rogue & Rouge edit
  • The High Maintenance dilemma: is smartness underrated?
  • How to plan the perfect Hygge weekend: Allegra does Hygge
  • Fashion Lessons I learned in Japan

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