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Category: Creative writing & opinion pieces

I am not adopting a capsule wardrobe and this is why you shouldn’t either

This blog was born with a single core value: to be honest with my readers at all times.

As you may or may not have noticed, that’s why the site’s motto is The Honest Fashionista Diaries, why I chose to publish this as my first post ever, and why there is an entire category called The Honest Fashionista Series. Openness is important to me and that (plus a pinch of humour) cannot harm the Blogosphere.

With that said, I believe there is a big difference between being sincere and blatantly regurgitating my unsolicited opinions at the earliest opportunity. After all, we have the right to hold off-record thoughts which we’d better keep for ourselves. As my grandmother taught me when I was very young: if you have nothing pleasant to say, it is better to say nothing. In other words, you don’t need to fight every battle or give your opinion about every topic on earth.

By nature, I am a peacemaker—one of my sisters refers to me as the O.N.U. family negotiator which never fails to make everyone laugh—and I try to avoid conflict when I see no good can be done. Summing up, I might be honest but I also know when to shut my mouth.

I am not adopting a capsule wardrobe and this is why

When the capsule wardrobe philosophy became a trend, I patiently read as many articles and blog posts as I could to have an informed opinion on the subject. What I found out though, didn’t resonate with me at any level, so I took a step back and kept my opinion to myself. Usually, this would be the end of the story—and it was for a couple of years—but a few weeks ago, I received an unnerving message via Instagram. The person who sent it was reacting to one of my outfit photos and felt the need to rave about how terrible I was as a person for posting pictures of me wearing my clothes, and what an awful example I was for every young impressionable person out there. People like me were, in her own words, a total disgrace and I should be ashamed for not promoting capsule wardrobes and sustainable fashion.

You can believe me when I say my first reaction was nothing but confusion. Mainly because:

A.  My Instagram is a small account that (luckily) receives zero hate.

B.  I don’t consider my content to be exclusively focused on outfits.

C.  You can easily see I wear my clothes more than once and I am very far from a serial shopper.

Once the original feeling of astonishment left me, it was replaced by disbelief and finally, an increasing outrage. However, I blocked the person and forget about the whole thing as soon as possible. Three days ago though, I received a new DM via Instagram which contained almost the same message, sent from a sister account. Again, she seemed disgusted by the fact I kept posting my “non-sustainable” outfits and NOT EMBRACING THE CAPSULE WARDROBE TREND.

If that person would have spent a single moment to visit this blog by clicking in the link on the bio, she’d have probably learned a thing or two about my style perception and the sustainability topic.

For starts, the main reason why I’ve never written about the capsule wardrobe philosophy before is that, from my point of view, it suffers from some serious inconsistency on its base principles. The main target is reducing waste and using the whole contents of your wardrobe, which can only be a positive thing per se. However, reducing to thirty-three pieces your existing closet makes no sense from a logistic perspective.

First, the continuous rotation of the same pieces will inevitably damage even the best-quality pieces, leaving you with the urgent need to replace them at the end of the season at the latest. Potentially, this means money and waste. Second, thirty-three pieces may help you to survive for a season if the given items are high-quality but you will need to add a new set when the season changes and pack away (or dispose of) the used stuff. This means buying four new capsule wardrobes a year which depending on your budget and previous shopping habits might not be that good all things considered.

After second thoughts, there is yet another aspect holding me back: the deep existent association between capsule wardrobes and uniformity. One of the main ideas, you see, it to achieve a very defined style, with all the pieces working together. Pretty much, like a uniform.

One of the things you don’t know about me is that I studied at a religious private school for a couple of years. I could write an interesting (and probably juicy) list of the lessons I learned over there but the main and most important one was uniformity is rarely a good thing. When you make people wearing the same neutral colours every day, looking alike, there is a certain point in which they start thinking and acting alike. And I have read enough dystopian fiction to be afraid of any form of hive mind (thank you very much for the nightmares, Mrs. Atwood).

To me, fashion is all about individual expression and I think that’s something wonderful.

So, am I openly admitting I don’t give a s@#€ about sustainability? As a matter of fact, nothing is further of the truth. Adopting a capsule wardrobe is not the only way you can contribute to a sustainable lifestyle. Instead, I prefer to explore other paths including but not limited to:

  1. Taking good care of your existing pieces, so their lifespan is extended

  2. Cutting down on your shopping habits and getting only the things you love

  3. Choosing clothes that are better quality and more durable

  4. Shopping second hand or vintage

  5. Supporting ethical brands of your choice

These might not look like life-changing rules but once you have been practicing for a while, you will realize they are. I have been shopping vintage, second hand and being more selective with my shopping habits for a while now (I think about five years and counting) and in the long run, you feel nothing but satisfaction and relief. Satisfaction because you love everything on your wardrobe. Relief because you can walk outside a shop with empty hands and feel good about it, anyway.

So, the next time anyone feels tempted to judge me for posting outfit photos online, please make me a favour and just unfollow…

 

 

 

November 21, 2019November 20, 2019

Allegra Caro51 Comments

What I’ve learned after one year of blogging: the good, the bad, and everything in between

They say time flies when you are having fun but the last twelve months slipped away so fast, I wonder if they even existed.

Fortunately though, I published my first blog post ever last November and since then, I have updated this site regularly, which means I enjoy the rare privilege of a detailed year record. Isn’t that something? I mean, I am the girl who doesn’t even manage to catch up with her Bloglovin’ reading list!—just imagine updating a website rigorously. But twelve months, fifty-five posts and an unutterable number of chocolate cookies later, I am still here (and so is this blog).

This year, I feel like I’ve written about every topic on Earth: from social prejudice to style advice, and from travel adventures to my experience visiting Vogue House. Surely, there will be many other topics to catch my attention but nevertheless, the most interesting part of this whole blogging trip is the lessons you learn on the way.

So let me keep this short and sweet, and introduce you to those modest pieces of wisdom I have treasured during my experience as a blogger.

lessons i learned after one year blogging

01.

Willpower Obstinacy is everything

Blogging, you see, can be quite a commitment: for many people, it might be only a hobby, but it does require discipline and a shocking amount of time from you. To be completely honest, I don’t even look at it as a hobby anymore but as my creative outlet, side hustle, and ultimately, as something that sparks joy in my life. Most of us would possibly agree that, if anything makes you feel that way, you’ll probably want to stick to it. No matter how challenging it is.

As reluctant as I am to admit this publicly, I’ve never considered myself a person with huge willpower. However, I am stubborn to an extent most people would find embarrassing. Let me give you a very concrete example.

When I was about ten years old, a classmate told me that girls couldn’t wear trousers. At that age, the mere mention of the words “you can’t” acted as a trigger for me. So, I did the only sensible thing: for the next three months, I refused to wear nothing but pants to the school. THREE MONTHS. I wish I was joking: my family still refers to this anecdote as The 1993 Trousers Debacle.

The point is, obstinacy is my blogging fuel—it keeps me going when I am too tired to plan the editorial calendar when I think it’s not worthy, when I feel I am not good enough. If like me, you haven’t the biggest willpower, obstinacy will be equally effective.

what-i-learned-blogging

02.

And so is honesty

People who are still active blogging readers are interested in inspirational content—that’s right—but not as much as they are interested in relatable content. In my first year of blogging, my stats show a prevailing success of those posts providing an honest angle, both in terms of page views and likes. Two of my most celebrated articles featured my sincere approach to an average blogger routine as well as my thoughts on the future of blogging. In both cases, the reactions were strikingly positive.

The conclusion is definite: we might enjoy a bit of healthy guilty-pleasure content (with a pinch of crazy fashionistas flying in their private helicopters to the next shooting location in the Himalaya), but at the end of the day, we all value down-to-Earth blogs.

03.

Post about the things you care

You can tell when someone is writing about something just for the shake of it and for most of us, it’s a deal-breaker. Putting your readers off is the last thing you want to do because, before you realize, they will be hitting the back button and never looking back. To avoid that, you really need to figure out what is your passion. Are you a baker at heart but you keep posting about fashion trends? Time to stop it. Now. Just stop typing. I mean it.

what-i-learned-after-one-year-of-blogging

04.

Always be you (all the other roles are taken)

Please, learn this by heart and then write it on a post-it and stick it to your forehead, so you remember every time you look in the mirror: Let your personality shine.

As I mentioned before, most readers can tell when you’re randomly posting about something you don’t care but they also can tell when you are faking it. Look, I get you—with a blogosphere full of clones who will dress, pose and write the same exact way the temptation of blending in is strong. But believe me, in the long-term, it will do more harm than good to your blog. People like to feel the person behind the screen. YOU are the main reason they will come back to your site once and again. So remember this young Padawan: Fight the dark side of the Force!

05.

Don’t forget to have fun

You might be ambitious. You might work very hard to transform your side-hustle into your own little business, becoming the ultimate #girlboss. You have all my sympathy and respect for that. But let me tell you something: If you leave fun out of the equation too soon, you will burn out in no time.

I assume the reason you are investing all your —probably scarce—leisure time in your site is because you love it. That’s the main fuel for most bloggers. So you need to be sure you keep the flame alive. Have fun while writing and if you need it, take a step back to evaluate your true motivations.

Are you blogging for the six figures income and over-night success? Then, and I am very sorry to be the one bursting your bubble. Blogging, you see, doesn’t work like that. Just like in any other business you need to be passionate and also very patient. But if you love it, if you are enjoying the whole process, it is totally worth it.

On the other hand, if you really love what you are doing, you will get the necessary motivation to make the most of it. And this is what it is all about, isn’t it?

November 11, 2019November 7, 2019

Allegra Caro30 Comments
Is fashion blogging dead in 2019

Does fashion blogging even make sense anymore?

is fashion blogger profitable

Unless you have been hiding under a rock for a couple of years, there is a chance you are aware of that obsessive anathema regarding the alleged death of fashion blogging.

The rumour has been written in forums, shared, and even printed in t-shirts as a catchy slogan: “Fashion bloggers are dead!”, they say, “Long live Instagram!” This tagline might sound like seasonal news material — a form of objective information, if you please —, once you come closer though, a mild vindictive flavour can be appreciated.

For a long time and as a relatively new industry, blogging aroused suspicion and a great deal of controversy. Certainly, it took some time for the public to understand that blogging was nothing but a digital version to fashion editorials, curated by anonymous people who shared their personal approach to style. In the beginning, there was nothing aspirational about it: most bloggers were mothers, students, or corporate ladies living their lives while blogging for fun.

On a deep level though, it could be argued that it turned into sort of a sisterhood, where normal women could partake of the fun and stop feeling like “Plain Janes”.

This was the starting point from which the blogging empire ascended.

fashion blogging dead in 2019

As in any other field, some bloggers started taking a more occupational direction: blog layers were endlessly edited, while outfits became more and more polished. Some started suggesting that authenticity was sacrificed at the expense of professionalisation — a topic stirring passions that would require a post of its own.

The same people (and conservative media) who criticised early authors for their lack of expertise, began resenting their new attitude. Even so, the industry was growing, with a few top bloggers gaining status as respected experts and making a six-figure income.

There was no point in denying reality anymore: fashion blogging was here to stay.

Once bloggers grew into brands and household names, blogging became mainstream. As in any popular industry, the market was suddenly saturated. Many even suggested that the cooperative spirit between bloggers vanished overnight. The same industry which gained momentum as the anti-establishment of fashion, they pleaded, morphed into the materialization of its nemesis.

is fashion blogging dead

This was the defining moment in which Instagram was introduced too: a simpler platform that would allow people to post their outfits without the nuisance of composing an entire article around it. Naturally, many saw it as the perfect way to save-up countless hours of writing and editing and dropped off their websites in favour of Instagram. After all, why to spend days working on a blog post when you could easily share your outfit in real-time?

Back in 2016, Tavi Jennison (who became famous by sitting front row at NYFW as an influencer at the age of 12) famously stated: “Yikes, what is the function of this blog anymore? Everything is basically on my Instagram…!”, a sentence that embodied a whole new worldview.

At that point, the question became quite obvious: was fashion blogging dead?

A recent study shows that the Millenial generation prefers social media as an advice resource and the decreasing number of style, outfits and fashion trends blogs seems to provide enough evidence. At the same time, the progressive abandonment of the term blogger in favour of content creator can’t be ignored as a clear indication of this process.

But then, should we all quit our blogs in 2019 and go home?

Personally, I am an optimist: yes, the market might be saturated and highly competitive, and yes, it might be hard to become six-figures income blogging royalty these days (pretty much as hard as becoming a dazzling movie star), but I do believe people are still interested. Nowadays, many blog readers value them as a way to unwind after a hard working day — a certain detachment from social media hectic pace. Maybe, the secret of blogging survival lies in this quality time dimension. Surely, only time will tell. As for now, let me close this article with a good wish:

Long live fashion blogging!


Is fashion blogging dead in 2019

wearing

Cami top: Zara / Sailor trousers: Vivienne of Holloway

Sunglasses: HM (old, similar here) / Straw bucket bag: Primark (similar at La Redoute)

Other accessories: off brand

 

 

August 14, 2019August 15, 2019

Allegra Caro34 Comments

In praise of Insta-husbands: The truth about those men taking our pictures

The curtain rises: a girl in her best bib and tucker (perfect ombré hair, polished nails, a thousand euro designer bag) positions herself under a floral arch at the closest coffee shop door; her husbands enters the scene, camera in hand, and starts patiently shooting professional photos of her. He never complains. He works for free every weekend, though.

In 2019, this could be described as contemporary drama and is carefully performed in every developed country on a daily basis. The presentation has become so common, nobody raises an eyebrow anymore. After all, you know what they say – it didn’t really happen unless it is on Instagram…

This sort of post-modern philosophy seems to leave you with two options only: Being invisible, irrelevant, or endlessly working for that perfect shot that will make it to the Internet. However, for people making a living from blogging and social media, there is one choice only.

husbands behind the camera

My instagram husband

Some would say that a logical approach to the business plan must include photography budget (and they are probably right), but with a competitive market making more and more difficult to start a small company, most bloggers find themselves saving a significant amount of money by kindly asking their partners to give them a hand.

This, my friends, is the first act of an elaborated melodrama work that more often than not, develops into Greek tragedy.

On the weekend, I joined a friend for some last-minute Margaritas evening. While waiting for the cocktails to come, she commented on how excited she was about her upcoming trip to Santorini. ‘My husband is not that happy thought‘, she said inadvertently, ‘he resents the time we spend taking photos for Insta during holiday‘.

That sentence turned a red light in my head as I could not help but wonder: is Instagram affecting our romantic relationships too?

Intrigued, I made my research as soon as I reached home; unfortunately, the results look quite depressing in terms of numbers.

According to a study conducted by the International Currency Exchange (ICE), Brit holidaymakers spend 22 hours and 36 minutes over a nine days long trip taking snaps to post on social media. Yes, that’s an entire day. Nuts.

insta husbands in 2019

But let me share my own experience. When I first started part-time blogging last November, I knew my husband skills with the camera were essential. However, I underestimated how much time, effort and will it would take for him to help me – we are speaking about weekends and off days, some precious hours that could be used on something else, surely. Sometimes, the pressure of taking a nice photo that we can use for my blog can be slightly overwhelming too.

And this is when you need to establish limits.

For us, it is all about integrating photo sessions in our dates but limiting their length. On a typical day out we will spend one-hour maximum working and then the camera is packed away for good. If by any chance we don’t feel like taking pictures on a given occasion, we leave the equipment at home. That way we enjoy some quality time together. Once in a while, I will book a session with a professional photographer, so my husband gets some relief and I still have some pictures to use. As a blogger, these decisions might be far from perfect, but taking care of my relationship is a personal priority.

uk instagrammers husbands

blogger photographer

But what happens to those who become 24/7 Insta-husbands? How do they cope with a brand new demanding career that is so recent and frequently misunderstood?

Social perception on the matter is linked to issues such as Fragile Masculinity. For some, it may be hard to shift from a traditional system in which men were considered the main providers to a new role as career supporters. Those men might be ready to become professional assistants, photographers, and editors but society is still making fun of them (and the women who allegedly force them to be “trivial”).

Taking endless pictures of their wives/girlfriends? Is that even a job? (Spoiler alert: IT IS). It takes guts and a healthy dose of deconstruction for them to become the man behind the great woman. Even when it means to earn much more money, potentially. As for society? Well, only time will tell.

instagrammer husband

bloggers husbands

In the meantime, we can all support Insta-husbands (and Instagrammers) publicly by showing some respect for the work they do. Blogging might be a new industry, but people working hard in front and behind the camera are professionals and do deserve acknowledgment.

Do you think their job is a no-brainer? Well, I suggest you taking part in a little experiment: try to take a good picture (and I mean a professional one), then edit it, and oh, don’t forget to curate an entire feed that works smoothly together in the process. Easy-peasy, right?

After all, an Instagram husband would manage…

 

Men behind the camera

 

 

July 23, 2019July 23, 2019

Allegra Caro8 Comments

A Colourful Revolution: Mary Quant, the V&A retrospective

 “London was dead. Fog permeated everything. Fog was a smell. Fog was a colour.”

In the context of a grim, black and white post-war London, the work of Mary Quant bloomed like a Winter Rose – an unexpected crimson brush-stroke in the snow.

No one in that colour-blind world could have foreseen it but when the suburban Goldsmith schoolgirl opened her first experimental shop in Chelsea, she was meant to start a vivacious revolution. Back in the day, couture embodied the rigid war generation mindset, deeply related to subjects such as traditional gender roles and a narrow elite class access to fashion.  Baby boomers not only failed to empathise but also refused to do so: they were eager for freedom. “Fashion should be a game,” Quant wrote once, a motto an entire generation lived for.

When wandering about the V&A halls at the Mary Quant exhibition, one can easily come across ladies who look at the dresses with a nostalgic smile. “I had a dress very similar to this one,” 73-year-old Mary Brighton says, “I was only 14 then. My parents didn’t like it but they hadn’t much to say. I would work every Saturday on a tiny Carnaby Street shop to save the money.” Her friend Betty Wilkes nods her head: “Everything was grey then: the rain, the streets, the boring schooldays… And suddenly, she showed us the idea of hue. It was a bit like Technicolor, only better.”

 

Mary Quant OBE dress
1966 OBE dress

This image deeply resonates with Quant’s work. Chromatism was used wisely as a part of an elaborated concept – to deconstruct British tradition by empowering women. Significant examples (sometimes, in the form of iconic dresses; sometimes, in the shape of lustrous raincoats, shoes or tights) are visible: if you take a minute to visit the ground floor, the OBE Dress must be admired. In 1966, the designer was appointed Officer of the British Empire, a medal awarded for her contribution to the UK fashion export trade, supporting the national economy. For the occasion, Quant created a bright cream gown to stand out in the crowd in a gloomy November afternoon. Her beret was designed to look like an English schoolgirl hat, the entire outfit recalls the Victorian boarding school institution but she gave her a fresh and modern twist. The short skirt shook Royal protocol.

Another quintessential example is to be found on the first floor. The 1967 tartan dress was deliberately made on Victorian-inspired patterned cloth and conservative bodice. However, the new hemline, as well as the usage of synthetic materials such as rayon with Lurex thread, helped to create a sparkling party dress – The Swinging 60s paradigm.

Although Quant is mainly credited for making mini-skirts popular, it could be argued that her most impressive achievement was the capacity to anticipate and capture the new age sensibility. Hence, it is no shocker that other visionary legends of the period like former Vogue creative director Grace Coddington (then a promising model) embraced Quant’s philosophy and wore her pieces.

Quant tartan lurex dress
1967 Tartan Lurex dress

But what makes Quant work bewitching is her own fascination about modernity. When new materials first came out, she was eager to experiment with them. “One day, a new fabric appeared on the scene,” she said, “PVC was shiny, waterproof, and unlike anything I’d ever seen before.” Her revolutionary usage of plastic for the 1963 Wet collection was a turning point in fashion. She conceptualized practical clothes to brighten gloomy weather days, sure, but the choice of a watery material and a simple, natural pattern has a lot to do with her early prediction of the deconstruction process: By rejecting perpetuation of the highly structured Dior silhouette, Quant seems to anticipate Zygmunt Bauman’s liquefaction concept. The 50s corseted designs are inevitably connected to highly hierarchically organized structures such as family, social class, and gender roles, all of them early refused by the Baby boomers generation who started moving from a solid, heavy society to a more fluid one.

Mary Quant PVC raincoat
1963 Wet Collection

It is quite significant that the V&A team decided to hold Christian Dior: Designer of Dreams and Mary Quant exhibitions at the same time, confronting both visions. On the subject, Quant once declared: “I always designed clothes from a very young age because I didn’t like the way they were. They were paralyzing; they were stilted.”

Paralysis is deeply connected to the topic, indeed. Women were frozen, a dragonfly on amber, trapped in a forced passive role conceived during the Old Regime times. With the second wave of Feminism in the 60s, themes such as reproductive and work rights became socially relevant. By giving women freedom of movement and rethinking gender stereotypes (her androgyny designs are worth to mention still today), Quant significantly contributed to the new cosmological vision. Hence, we can shamelessly affirm her work transcended the mere fashion substance to achieve a cultural patina of grandeur.

Certainly, Dame Quant also owned a natural genius for marketing and audience understanding: among many other fascinating moments, the exhibition portrays her elaborated plan to promote London as an avant-garde destination for the emergent American cosmopolitan class, while visiting New York in 1965. The Youthquake tour not only put London on the map but also succeeded to create a fan phenomenon over the brand, which sold out collections overnight.

 

Mary Quant tuxedo dress
Overdraft waistcoat and cheque book skirt (1967)

Curators Jenny Lister and Stephanie Wood have worked hard to bring together more than 200 pieces for the exhibition, many of them never displayed before. This is the result of a brilliant strategy: a public call-out to track down rare Mary Quant garments. Through hashtag #WeWantQuant people are still sharing their experience on Instagram. Many of the original owners’ stories are presented –together with their gowns– on a memorabilia masterpiece which is a page in the fashion book, as well as in the English history.

Now you have the opportunity to experience it: the exhibition opened on April the 6th and will run to March the 8th, 2020.

When leaving the V&A building, springtime drizzle falls across the grey London streets and a few colourful umbrellas pop here and there. And at the end of the day, the 21st-century woman writing this cannot help but bless Mary Quant for that.

 

June 6, 2019June 6, 2019

Allegra Caro3 Comments
Eegant style problems

The High Maintenance dilemma: is smartness underrated?

Raise your hand if you are familiar with this scene: you have just arrived at the office after a good hour in the commute surrounded by too many people, made it all the way in stilettos from the suffocating underground to the company building carrying your take away coffee, laptop and birthday cake for Amanda from the accounting department, and then logged in on time to collapse on your desk.

This morning you had to skip Yoga because your child did not feel like dressing up and husband had the flu. Even so, you managed to make yourself presentable. You managed to dress up for you, to feel good. Then, Tom and Claire from the Creative Editing team say hello and absently comment on how nice your dress looks and, you know, how hard it must be to get ready every morning because well, it is SO hard maintenance — and aren´t you actually sick of spending some much time just to get ready in the morning when you have much more productive things to do, surely?

The thing is, you see, Tom and Claire do not mean IT is high maintenance. They mean YOU are. Déjà vu, anyone?

Shockingly, it seems to be socially acceptable to comment on other people appearance these days, especially women’s. With social media blooming, everyone spends a lot of time leaving opinions on posts to perfect strangers (“What a stunning outfit!” “Is that your husband?” “But have you gained some weight lately?”) and the scope of this phenomenon has naturally transformed our daily interactions. People seem to feel entitled to comment in real life too, just as they would on Instagram, and not always out of kindness. If you take a minute to scratch the surface, an interesting patina of tones appears underneath — the complete palette of social prejudice. Misconceptions die hard, even in the age of political correctness.

 

Women smart style problems

 

One of my personal pet peeves is related to criticism towards smartness.

Very frequently, people will frown at the sight of a nice dress, coat or bag, and discreetly let you know they don’t approve. The succession of reasons provided will pour like rain over you — it is too expensive, impractical, pretentious. But where is this perception coming from? And is elegance considered a disgraceful quality these days?

It might sound crazy when you read all those articles on the flamboyant latest catwalk designs from Paris Fashion Week, but in my experience, most people do not appreciate that kind of stylishness anymore, since they cannot consider it as an integrated part of ordinary life. While maintaining discussions on the topic, they will argue that several factors need to be taken into account. Frequently, the first ingredient they will bring into the conversation is classism. I don’t know about you, but I take class discrimination seriously and I don’t like it to be used on a frivolous manner.

 

Elegant business women problems

Let me illustrate with an example. A few years ago, still a penniless humanities student, I found myself having a coffee with a recent acquaintance I’d had just been introduced to. By then, I would combine my college classes with a part-time job teaching foreign languages to kindergarten and school children. My allowance was very modest, and I carefully saved up and prioritized my expenses. I started spending some time hunting for good quality bargains at vintage and online shops. As a result and given the circumstances, my wardrobe grew up slowly but successfully.  The girl I met that evening did not lose the chance to let me know she liked my dress although she would not understand why would I spend “so much money” on it. “It must be nice”, she said, “to get your expenses covered by your very understanding family, right?” Then she made a gesture with her hand, vaguely pointing out my clothes and manicure (a manicure that I would give myself at home every time). She shamelessly implied my family was rather wealthy. And I was far too shy to correct her rude judgmental statement. Then she proceeded to complain about the hard time she was having to find proper accommodation for her next holiday in Austria. I swear God I am not making this up.

My point is this person (as many other) linked dressing in a certain manner with a well-off economic and social status. And of course, she disapproved. Paradoxically, she was doing far better than me then. There is a big difference between dressing on designer pieces head to toe and carefully crafting your style. Still, many people don’t see it that way. If you are able to gather a luxury couture wardrobe, good for you too! I see no reason to shame anyone here.

 

Smart style problems

Next argument detractors hold against smartness is practicality.

We all know how crazy life is these days: we find ourselves rushing on a daily basis and sometimes we don’t even take a minute to enjoy. Now, I am as busy as the next person (just as much as you probably are) and always try to wear clothes which easily adjust to my daily activity. I work in the comfort of an office, but flats will win three out of four times when it comes to commuting.

However, since I have not much time to stop and smell the flowers, I like to do some small things to indulge myself. They do not need to be big impressive things, necessarily: cooking something nourishing,  buying a nice book to read in the evenings, dressing up a bit. They are the small everyday pleasures I use to comfort myself and to keep inner balance. Even so, there will be always people judging you. Do not listen to them. As our friend Taylor Swift once taught us — haters gonna hate.

 

Eegant style problems

But my favourite plot is the high maintenance one.

Because well, you know, if you are wearing nice clothes it obviously means that you are some kind of spoiled creature, right? In the course of years, I have been seen people repeatedly gossiping about women who make an effort with their appearance. “But look at her!”, they would say, “She thinks she is some kind of queen, doesn’t she? I bet she even needs a maidservant to get dressed in the morning”. Do you think I am exaggerating here? I wish I was. I literally heard someone who used to talk behind my back calling me “a duchess”. In case you’re wondering why my only sin was to dress up for a casual outing with some friends… No need to say I have heard similar comments about friends, siblings and work colleagues.

Probably, the most unfair factor here is the insane amount of misogyny lying behind the question. Women are judged twice harder than men. If a man is smart, he will be usually praised for it. On the contrary, if a woman develops a taste for fashion, she will be considered frivolous. They will say she is wearing too much makeup or dressing up to catch men attention… However, if this fictitious woman freely decides to wear a bare face or comfortable sports clothes, she will be considered sloppy and lazy. Pick your poison.

Double standards will never let us women win and that is the reason why we need to stop contributing to the problem by criticizing other ladies and start fighting in the sorority team. I know it is not always easy, as we have been all raised on prejudice and socialized on a system whose deeper structures work against individualism. Every time we choose to deconstruct these ideas and stop the gears, we are placing ourselves in the line of fire. It is a conscious decision and it takes guts to do it. Still, it is the right thing to do.

Next time Tom and Claire make a passive-aggressive comment to your office colleague in front of you, do not look the other way. Let them kindly know it is not OK to express unsolicited opinions about other people looks. Maybe they are not conscious about being inadvertently rude. If they are though, you will make them notice this kind of behaviour is not welcome around the place. At the end of the day, we are all people who deserve some respect, no matter what are looks, beliefs or origins are.


 

And this was another episode of The Prêt-à-porter Series. In the next chapter,  we will have a talk about some basic tips to dress up for a Brunch.

Stay tuned for more style advice!

 

February 4, 2019March 14, 2019

Allegra Caro10 Comments

Fashion Lessons I learned in Japan

“Let’s never come here again, cause it would never be as much fun.”

During my eleven hours flight to Tokyo last year, I deliberately watched Lost in Translation and could not help but feel Sofia Coppola got it right ‒ it is not about the inexpensive sushi or the massive LCD screens displaying music videos in Shinjuku, it is all about your memories.

Like most tourists, I brought a full case of souvenirs back from my trip.

Withal and as much as I enjoyed shopping around Asakusa area for traditional items with an authenticity flavour, I found out the best keepsakes were insubstantial ‒ playing a flâneur during the peak hour at Shibuya, the occasional matcha cup on a softly enlightened coffee shop, small talk with my sister while window shopping at Omotesandō, the beauty of a dusty pink kimono sight in the golden hour… Life, like a dragonfly, crystallized on amber.

As a millennial, there is no need to say I grew up loving all things Japanese.

I belong to the generation which raised Sailor Moon to the modern mythological category.

When I was a teenager, pop culture news from Japan arrived slowly and to us (poor Western children!) fell like rain in the desert. Street Fashion? J-Pop? Manga? You could burn down the cathedrals, we had our own religion. Even after many, many years, the serious woman with a nine to five office position who was boarding an overpriced flight noticed a shiver of the purest childish emotion: there I was, after all this time, finally visiting the oasis of my teenage dreams. Then my sister, a talented artist living in Tokyo, greeted me at the airport and that was the beginning of our best adventure up to today.

Do not get me wrong, I would gladly return to Japan tomorrow morning but a small part of me knows the experience would be completely different. Maybe a bit more tangible. Maybe a bit less surreal. After all, you cannot see things for the first time twice, can you? The process of discovering a new country resembles childhood, somehow. Every little detail catches your attention and remains there forever, floating like the scent of good perfume.

To me, it was about everyday beauty ‒ a moment of perfection shinning in the ugliness of a pavement metropolis. I can close my eyes and still see that old lady on gold and black furisode, standing on a crowded train wagon. I can smell the freshly baked taiyaki on a cold morning.

Tokyo outfit

Style in Japan

Unlike the characters of Coppola’s film, I did not experience a moment of enlightenment.

However, after intensive exposure to Japanese Street Fashion during our walks through Shibuya, Shinjuku, and Ginza, I learned a bit of style wisdom I would like to share here. Japanese ladies are some of the more stylish on the planet, although their achievements are frequently underrated and I find it truly unfair. So in order to honour them, these are the fashion lessons I learned in Japan.

  1. Statement coats are a MUST

Winter might make nearly impossible to show up that gorgeous outfit you have been planning for hours but Japanese ladies do not care about it. Instead, they pay much more attention to their coats than we European ladies do. A statement piece, you see, can make all the difference when it comes to transforming meh into yay. Their usual cold weather day look usually includes an awesome colourful coat paired with some nice shoes/boots and a designer bag. Following their example, I purchased the coat I am wearing in these pictures on a well-known Takeshita Dori vintage shop. Price was awesome for the quality and design, and I do not regret a thing to this day.

2. Everything can be accessorized

Maybe you think Western women know a thing or two about accessories, right? Forget about it! In Tokyo, fashionistas take the game to the next level. During one of my day trips to Ginza department stores, I fell in love with the newest trend consisting in adding wild silk and organza flowers to your plain boring coat buttons. Genius! By such a simple trick outwear looks instantly chic. This is just an example of how creative you can be, so do not be scared. Sometimes less is not more.

3. Experiment more

Pink hair? Neon pants? Transparent mini bag packs? Welcome to Tokyo. Japanese Street Fashion is well-known for a reason ‒ people are all but scared to experiment. Some of their trends are frequently discovered and imported to the Western market, via haute couture. My piece of advice is to follow their example and experiment a bit. Do you like it? Then own it, babe.

4. Invest in some quality pieces

I have recently written about how consumerism has become a tidal wave in Japan.

However, the main Japanese immanent style accomplishment to me is the ability to wear an investment piece as a part of an everyday outfit and make it look natural. Personally, I have always been a bit hesitant about wearing my best pieces on a daily basis. After my trip, though, I understood that you can only justify the price tag by actually wearing it. You know it makes sense.

5. Above all, always be you

Fashion is all well and good but sometimes we forget about our better judgement in its favour. Style should all be about finding what YOU like. Style shifting every season like a snake changes its skin can be kind of exhausting (not to mention expensive). Tokyo fashionistas discovered this fact many years ago and they tend to develop their own signature style. It is completely inspirational to me and a rule to swear by.

But the most important lesson I learned was style is a universal language. You cannot get lost in translation.


japanesecoat

wearing

Coat: Juliette et Justine (vintage).

Necklace: Vivienne Westwood (similar here)

Dress: Stradivarius/ Jumper: Zara / Boots and Bag: Deichmann

January 23, 2019March 14, 2019

Allegra Caro12 Comments
Confessions of a Vogue addict

Confessions of a Vogue addict

I am going to tell you a story — most of it is true.

It could have happened to anyone: to a Jewish schoolgirl living in Newark, to a shy working-class girl from La Butte Aux Cailles. However, for good or bad, it happened to me.

This tale starts with a box in the garret.

During last Spring cleaning I found a mysterious container in one of the top shelves (no identification tags to be seen) and when I tried to grab it, a totally unexpected glitter shower fell down all over me. Now, I have no idea where the glittery dust came from exactly, and I can only suppose it was closely related to some Christmas decorations stored in the same room but, in any case, I spent the next ten minutes brushing myself until I finally managed to open the aforementioned box.

Anyone who knows me is aware of the fact that I have a soft spot for drama: my restless mind was already anticipating a shocking find, which could only leave me speechless and knocking on the doors of my own Gothic novel. After all, many great stories start with a girl finding something in the attic, don’t they? So I was disappointed, to say the least, when I simply found a pile of old magazines inside — thank you, Guillermo Del Toro, for my huge expectations regarding mystery tales and Tom Hiddleston on tight pants… But, where was I? Oh, yes: the box.

The secret was a bundle of about 40 Vogue Magazines, an entire lifetime in Fashion terms.

Some of them were my own, some were second-hand donations from friends. I had been putting off organization indefinitely, looking for a nice spot to display them on the living area, and then completely forgetting about their existence. I thought it was time to finally do it, and started dusting the pile a bit while flicking through. Before I realized, I had left the cleaning plans aside and was sitting Indian-style, a teacup in one hand, an old 2002 Vogue magazine in the other.

For some reason, there was something in the whole scene — the attic at dusk, the oversized ancient jumper I wore, the exhaustive look at the pictures — which made me feel nostalgic. But what was the source of such a mood?

I began thinking about the familiar feeling, a fragile Déjà vu of my school days, and suddenly it all hit me like a tidal wave: I was twelve years old and compulsively reading a pile of borrowed Vogue issues. I could see myself sitting in the exact same position, wearing long braids and a plaid pinafore dress. Memory was so vivid I could almost touch it with the fingertips.

It all looked so similar, but also so different. By the time of my flashback vision, as I said, I was no older than twelve and had just moved to a new little town with my mother and sister. We lived in a 60 square meters flat above a shabby corner store, my parents had just divorced and I felt the unhappiest young human being. Puberty is not the best moment for such radical changes in the state of affairs, since nature is already playing its own little tricks — I still frown upon the memory when I recall I was the tallest girl in the class, the one with the biggest knee bones, not a clue on how to walk gracefully on those new giant doe-like legs. As a consequence, my (very nice) schoolmates used to call me Betty Spaghetty…

Coming of age drama, anyone? It was a bit like The Virgin Suicides, only without all the flawless blonde hair, and fabulous white gowns, and obsessed boys. It was… well, ineffably plain, to be honest. And then it did happen.

My mum, who was also having a bad time to readjust, made a new friend.

He was an aspiring fashion designer — young, restless and absolutely gay. Also, he was the first sophisticated person I ever met. Every Saturday evening, rain or shine, he would come home with a few Italian films and fashion magazines, and we would spend the night chatting, watching Mastroianni masterpieces and sharing Chinese food.

And finally, one fine November Saturday, he brought a bag full of Vogue magazines.

It was the first time I saw one (provincial town girls rarely had any chance to get it in the local newsstand, anyway), and immediately felt in love with all those 90s goddesses from the Vogue magazine covers owning the catwalk — you did not know what chic meant until you saw Naomi Campbell on purple satin for Anna Sui. I spent the whole weekend checking them, and got a new pile next week, the week after that. Suddenly, my life expanded: there were no more lonely after-school evenings; instead, I got an effective shield made of designer dresses, lively colours and glamour. A whole entire universe of my own which no one could destroy.

It took me some time to realize how bitter-sweet my fantasy was. For a little working-class girl, there were very little chances to ever access the gilded heaven of haute couture. And then, I started thinking it would never be possible to incorporate sophistication to my own life.

Vogue gave me something to dream about, but was it possible to keep that dream alive?

Confessions of a Vogue addict

As I entered adolescence, I lost all faith.

I stopped reading fashion magazines and watching classic movies. All those things belonged to the past — the lost paradise, the Arcadia of my own candidness. By fifteen, I had become a solipsist. When I started university, I was a fully-fledged nihilist.

But then again, I made new friends. We started going out together, having cheap cocktails and attending European cinema festivals. We met up at poetry lectures, and jazz clubs. We developed a taste for fine culture. And one early morning (on my way back from some party) I stopped to get me a takeaway coffee in the campus surroundings, and they were selling Vogue. It was like meeting an old good friend.

Like the glitter in my hair, you can try to brush out something you loved, but it will stick to you for some time. That morning, I finally accepted there are many forms of sophistication, many of them more subtle than a 10,000 euros Delacroix jacket.

From that moment, the twelve years old and the undergraduate made peace.

The woman who writes this is now in her thirties and does not care if she can buy the latest Tom Ford dress. Instead, she loves vintage and second-hand, visiting every gallery while traveling and yes, classic movies.

She is still looking for a place to display the pile of Vogue magazines gracefully, but for now, they live in the parlor library.

Downstairs.

November 29, 2018April 29, 2019

Allegra Caro14 Comments

The lingerie Morals (Why wearing fine lingerie doesn’t make you dummy)

 

 

We like to think of ourselves as modern and sophisticated, but we apply double standards on how we perceive designer lingerie.

While fashion media proclaims luxury underwear as the quintessence of femininity, the cherry on the cake of seduction, most women simply frown on the sight of a suspender belt. Not so long ago, a co-worker of mine embodied the commonplace in one sentence, “It looks pretty on magazine models. I would never wear such a thing, though”. Implied by these words, the hidden truth — no femme sérieuse will be taken like one by openly admitting she has a soft spot for Lise Charmel.

Many years ago, still a literature student and not a spare penny to spend in high-end bras, some friends and I were discussing the topic over cheap rosé. At the time, Gossip Girl was big on TV and we were simply breathless at how beautiful Leighton Meister looked in Agent Provocateur. However, there was some discomfort over conversation since none of us wanted to say we felt both inspired and maybe a bit jealous.

But then again, why did we react like that? By looking back now, a bunch of reasons comes to my mind. As the typical Humanities Bachelors in their twenties, we all considered ourselves as clever, original, and wittily critical with society, which made us unable to be more honest. In our defence, it could be argued that we were young and restless: therefore, a bit lack of experience, as well as a bit prone to the holier-than-thou nonsense (probably derived from a consistent diet of endless European cinema soirées, and the influence of the unavoidably pseudo-intellectual male acquaintances, who enjoyed mansplaining mostly every possible thing to us).

On designer lingery

 

The point is we said many stupid things I will not reproduce here, but also talked about the over-sexualization of Victoria’s Secret angels on stage.

 

Like many other women, we felt intimidated by this unreal image of sensuality which unequivocally entails a passive gender role. We did not want to represent any of the associated parts — the virgin, the slut, the bombshell. By accepting these we would surely lose control of our bodies, our identities and least but not last, our lives.

At some point though, one of my friends introduced a twist-plot in the chat. “Why do you assume lingerie is just for men?” she said, “Why do they even need to know you are wearing it?” That, for a start, was an interesting question.

 

As much as we were hard trying to deconstruct our vision of the world, we would not stop focusing the whole thing on male vortex. After listening to a good hour of moral preening, she got sick and kindly explained an obvious but game-changing idea to us, the revolutionary concept of start enjoying ourselves just for the sake of it.

Lingerie could be fun if you simply looked at it as another form of joy and self-expression. She suggested — and this is something that has walked with me not only in my twenties, but also all through my thirties — to wear it, if we pleased, as an invisible armour. Her exact words were to get dressed from the inside. I gave it a thought, understanding that even if I had a lazy old jeans and t-shirt day, I could cheerfully wear my best undies as well. It could be like painting my nails red on a blue Monday, or reading my favourite author while drinking coffee in a nice quiet place. And what was the best part? — Only I would know.

There are still many things I do not buy about the whole lingerie business conception.

I will never be comfortable about how the VS angels are presented, or about how much transparency a single clothing piece can display on such compromising areas. Nevertheless, I truly share the whole new concept many brands have developed: from Dita von Teese to What Katie Did, some are now paying more attention to what we feel like, reinforcing body positivity in the process. This is for sure a feminist contribution: no more slut shaming, body shaming, or any other moral implications.

I bless the fact it is more about us women now, and a bit less about them. And I bless the fact that another woman was able to make me change my mind.

If you are reading this dear, you know who you are.

 


 

Fine lingerie

November 22, 2018March 14, 2019

Allegra Caro15 Comments
Allegra Caro

No Carrie Bradshaw here

Fashionable, sophisticated, politically correct.

These were the three golden rules for a successful blogger an acquaintance provided me with during casual brunch a few weeks ago. The aforementioned girl — a blooming online talent with much of a potential to become an influencer in no time — passed this piece of advice to me, convinced it could turn any blogging pumpkin into a first-class carriage for the internet royalty overnight. I, on the other hand, could only look at my salmon bagel doubtfully, while wondering what were the chances the crystal pumps would hit a pebble on the road and send me straight to the emergency room.

If you have read until this point, maybe you are thinking how the hell did I found myself having that conversation…

Allegra Caro style content creator

I should probably start by explaining that, for most of my lifetime, I have enjoyed telling stories (and more specifically, writing them). Fables, tales, articles — you name it. Another passion of mine was always style. Many years ago, when the internet was all fields, I briefly hosted an online diary, which reflected a lot of my personal impressions and my younger-self embarrassing fashion choices. It is gone now (and for the better!), but after transitioning to adulthood and going through a lot of freelance copywriting, the good-old blogging bug stung me again.

With all of this in mind I picked up the phone and asked my generous friend to share some pro-tips in exchange for a nice Sunday brunch.

However, the allegedly golden rules seemed inadequate to me (if not completely unfit). Yes, I have got plenty of experience on writing. And yes, I was expecting to create a moderately successful site. I could not avoid a bit of hesitation, though.

Allegra Caro is a style blogger

Be fashionable, she said.

This, for sure, sounded like reasonable advice for someone aspiring to post on clothes regularly. The only problem is I am not a fashionable person. I DO love fashion, don’t get me wrong, and Haute Couture is undeniably an art whose power of attraction frequently mesmerizes me. BUT I cannot, for my life, consider myself as a trendy individual. Stylish? Maybe.

To be honest, I am not very interested in high street trends, or the Fast Fashion phenomenon. Hence, first rule was probably… well, not fitted to me, to say the least.

allegracaro4

 Be sophisticated.

This was the one which made me feel truly insecure. Sophisticated. Who? Me? The girl writing this post on a Budapest train with no air conditioning during the most glorious heat-wave August afternoon, and who totally gave up on looking presentable (or even a human being)?

When I think about sophistication, Carrie Bradshaw (Sex in the City heroine) always comes to my mind.

I can see her stopping a cab in Valentino. Would she be in this train, she would not even sweat, and she’d be telling amusing stories with a cosmo in her hand, seducing everyone in the process. As for me? Well, I’ve mostly run out of lukewarm still water, and I am far too concerned the passenger next to me will think I am some kind of terminal-touristy case.

Allegra Caro is a blogger

At least, I can hear you say, you could try being politically correct. And I could… if I was planning to post outfits only. The thing is I am kind of chatty (you would not guest, based on these 500 words of nonsense, would you?), and chatty people can go controversial.

There is also one more thing: I am not planning on posting outfits only.

The main reason I follow blogs is because I enjoy reading other people, putting myself in their shoes. And so, I would like to find a personal balance by analyzing the link between fashion and culture. I’d dare to be honest. To write on things I really care about.

And I might be controversial, sometimes.

The truth is, there are little chances I manage to be fashionable, sophisticated, or politically correct. Probably, I will never be Carrie Bradshaw. I hope you will excuse me, though.


November 12, 2018March 14, 2019

Allegra Caro26 Comments

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Hi, I am Allegra!

A thirty-something Spanish expat with a love for Haute couture, books and period dramas. Way too many little black dresses in my closet. You can read more about me here.

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